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PROFILE
Delphius.HCBowl.08S62.Athena.S<3NE-SNSD
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November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
November 2009
THANK YOU
My life these days revolve around, well, bowling. And the sense of anticipation before every session is immense. In both a good and bad way I suppose. I just really want to get out there and bowl, the kind of adrenaline rush that you'd get when you feel really confident about something. But when it ends, I get this hangover, and I start looking forward to the next session. No doubt, Ive been paying much less attention in what little lectures and tutorials I go to, but I vow to work doubly hard after May 8th, when A divs end.
And it isnt hard to realise that Im drifting further away from my class now, and it isnt a good thing. There is hardly anything in common so I just join them for lectures, tuts, then sleep/listen to music/do work at the benches. 0 communication. Its definitely because much more time has been spent with my team. I dont know how or if this situation will improve, but its sad how I dont even care anymore :/ My teammates are simply the best people to be around, since most (okay, fine, some) are crazy like me, and every moment will be spent joking and laughing annd niaoing gabe. WOO. tag is like even more crazy, in a good way, and i really appreciate it, since he does make trainings/outings so much more funny. Yes, 'funny'. 'Fun' just doesnt do him enough justice.
SAKAE TEA-TIME BUFFET!
noreen ruiyi and gabe made me starve and live on vitasoy for half the day so I could eat more at the buffet. argh. You guys underestimate my powah...but in any case, I still ate alot, AND I LOVED IT! captnfelix joined us later at sakae. Our conversations were stupid and enjoyable. We covered practically everything under the sky, from Vlad the impaler to assrape, from tree branches to well, more ass rape and UP YOURSSS. It was hardly anything constructive or insightful, but I thoroughly enjoyed the time spent. Thanks guys (:
A divs update:
182.7 average during Singles
174.5 average during Doubles
I expect a 190-200 average for the team events. bahhh
Six more games. This time in teams.
End off with no regrets. End off with a bang.
This time I will.
Make them count.
So much for playing Mr Nice guy.
That said, I feel great from the work out, and happy that I could help cerealcyril, so I guess it evens out.
Its been a long and draining day, but it was fruitful nonetheless. I realised I can do organic chem so much better now, and im not exactly hopeless in Math, which is always an added bonus. Training was also extremely enlightening. I found out my Maxxx still has some reaction left in it. That reaction, along with its inherent pin-slashing, -obliterating, -destroying pin action, will rape at A divs. Im sure of it. CNV was sexy and reliable as ever. I cant believe im talking about my arsenal, but, I am. So there we have it. Maxxx CNV Blackberry will own at A divs. I simply cant wait.
Religion is a complicated and tricky matter. Its been an ethical minefield ever since mankind came into existence. Suf gabe tag noreen and I had a meaningful discussion about religion, though I have no idea how the topic was raised :/ But we did anyway, and I kind of learnt something from it all. I hope I didnt sound preachy or anything, since I know fully well that its pointless trying to force a religion or belief on anyone else. Cityharvest and newcreation may beg to differ, but I dont really care, since they can do whatever they want to promote the Christian faith and it wouldnt concern me. Like how sufen puts it, religion should be about a personal relationship with God, and whether or not we want to have this relationship eventually depends on us alone.
Whatever it is, whether we believe in God or religion, or not, we all live happy and great lives. And life has been just that for me recently. I want this little bubble of joy, happiness and fufillment to last. So, we'll see if it does.
We all live and learn another day.
phew, thank God for that. XD
wish for something to take it all away.
Im hoping I will be able to bowl when that day comes :/
Typical day in school on the whole. But oddly enough though, I felt extra lethargic the whole day. So I fell asleep in chemlab, chem lecture and well, I would have fallen asleep in econs too if not for the chemistry A1 practical I had to finish. But then when you look back at my day, it doesnt turn out quite as odd as I first put it out to be, since I fall asleep in lessons most of the time anyway. Hmmm.
Physics with mrlow enlightened me quite abit. No, not about physics. I did understand E-field more now though, but thats not what I meant. He started the lesson off with a speech/lecture/whatever, and some points he mentioned did make me think "what in the world have I been doing up till now?"
We want so many things. We have unlimited wants, in fact. But do we want them enough? Am I working hard enough to get what I want? When we long for something in life, we would do something about it, wouldnt we? But when we dont put in enough effort, when we dont work hard enough, does that mean we dont want it bad enough? Im not sure, since I know deep down that I want some things bad enough. But sometimes I question my determination, for I have always thought myself to be someone who would never give up as easily as most. As long as I genuinely want something or to get something done, I will keep going. mrlow made me realise, that I mistook faith for determination. I have no qualms about waiting, and believing that something will happen, without actually doing much to get things done. Do I want that A at Alevels bad enough? Yes. As bad as the other 85% A students? Yes. Am I doing enough to get that A? Sadly, no.
Its been my greatest downfall. Its like how you care about people around you, but dont do the right things to show them that you do. How are they to believe, or to actually KNOW, that you do care? It just doesnt matter how much we can try and hope that they can somehow feel it, because they simply cant.
If tomorrow never comes, would she know how much I loved her?
She probably wouldnt.
Because I never got to showing her that I did.
Until its too late and nothing matters anymore now.
I simply have got to get things together, and work doubly hard. I want to bowl well in A divs. I want to get my A's. So do whats needed to get them.
This I must do.
Why cant we go back to the days when we actually had fun together.
At least back to when we were friends,
and actually talked.
Friends right up till the day I felt something special.
Then it all went downhill.
Why do we hurt the ones we love most?
I wish I did.
I wonder just how long I can keep this up.
baby what happened to forever.
Anyway, we had our first schoolteam training today at OCC, the competition venue. I actually thought I did fine today, but my spares were horrible. They were a total disgrace la. My only saving grace were my first balls, that were quite consistent. Much credit has to go my wife. Pin action ftw (: I enjoyed bowling today, and well, felix happened not to be there. I have nothing against felix, honestly, so get that straight. It just so happens that I dont feel right. But now that we're in the same team, and we're doubles partners, I will have to make it work. Somehow. I hope he doesnt find out, cause it would just make things awkward. Its nothing personal, its just bowling.I still love you captain felix :DD
We then went to that shopping mall at yishun, whatever its called, to have lunch. The few of us ended up eating teppanyaki, which was unexpectedly very filling, and value for money. The chef gave us 4 extra bowls of rice for free ((: and extra veggies. So it was great. I still feel guilty having accepted his offer though :/
AND I GOT MY NEW PHONE!
My previous one died. Sort of.
After 2 years of service, he lost a limb and had to be replaced. Survival of the fittest. The screen is messed up, because water seeped in one day I think. I couldnt even trade it in because of that. Damn. So I got the W595 walkman phone. I know its not the latest. I know its common. But I dont care. It just looks the sexiest and nicest out of all the other phones in the whole Singtel retail outlet. And I still like it, alot. :D
love someone,
and you know you'll be there for her when no one else is.
when the rest of the world turn their backs on her,
you'll be the one staring at those backs, with her.
to be loved by someone,
means you know that person will do the same for you.
p.s. liverpool rocks.
ps1 torres is the best striker.
ps2 gerrard is the best midfielder.
ps3 carragher is the best defender.
psp hi gabriel (:
Well, s62 had its first SVJ and STJ for this year, and it was good cause I had quite a bit of fun. Our senior-vs-junior was held at that other LAN shop below IRC, or commonly referred to as, sleazy. Because thats what it looks like. A sleazy LAN shop. We play 2 -cm matches and won both. But thats only because we got lucky. The 'junior' team, comprising only of 1 s62 junior, lacked coordination. Their dratfs would have owned ours upsidedown, insideout, had they had better teamwork. I think we ended the first game with a score of 20(sentinel)-48(us) or something. Then we ended the second game before 35 mins.
Team: Joseph 'Pacerier' Peh
Melvin 'Prolohz' Lee
Benjamin 'benxie' Xie
Wei Ze 'GuinsoomE' Lim
Me.
Siao, those middle names look so cool. I like it that way. :D
JTS could have been slightly better though. We basically just hanged out and talked cock, and couldve used some other form of entertainment or programme. It still turned out quite fun though, because ben got OMGWTFPWNZ by dayan's VICEGRIP OF DOOM. Thats a week of shoulder pain and bruising, but the mental trauma will be foreverr.
The food was decent at best, so it wasnt quite up to my liking. Miss Clarity Cafe needs to improve. Its right next to national library where the lit people were watching some play btw.
Thank you cyril for the angel-mortal present. I forgive you for daoing my letters! I was shocked, literally, by the sweets. TWICE. It was some in bottle that can only be opened by squeezing on 2 metal plates on the cap. And if you do that, you...well...get a shock. :/
-I want to bowl. But training's on sunday, and I dont want to bowl the day before. So i shall persuade my parents to let me bowl today. And im actually thinking of pulling out of the team. But thatll have to wait until I sort things out. Till then, Im glad to be part of HCI's bowling team 2009.
Hmm, I went to 扫墓today. Woke up super early at like 930 (wth la) and then headed for 3 seperate places. All of us were melting under the sun. Try standing on top of a hill in front of a grave, with no tree for shelter, under the sun at 12. :/ not very enjoyable. But I guess I did have fun, and it would be only right for us to carry on this tradition. Whether or not we are actually willing, is a different thing altogether. I wouldnt mind doing it again (: cause I got a tan AT LONG LAST. It might actually be sunburn, but who cares? At least im not white like those chicken rice chicken. And that alone is cause for celebration and jubilation and elation and celebration and...whatever.
In short, we won JVS (junior vs senior), and I got A for PW.
Im tired, so ill post again tomorrow. Ill be back.
Or so I can keep telling myself.
The first 3 hours of school today were spent meaningfully. 2 and a half hours of sleep during council elections, and a plate of hokkienmee from JC's canteen. What more can you ask of life?
Everything else, in fact.
I ended up not voting at the elections, simply because I never did feel any of the candidates were outstanding, which can then be attributed to my bedtime during Meeting-of-nominees and the election itself. No point voting for people simply based on how friendly they look on the election sheet :/
The school hates Athena. I swear. In total, Ive slept sitting up on the floor for 5 hours. Thats only because they couldnt find it in them to give Athena 2 LT's, like they did with Artemis during Meet-the-candidates, and couldnt give us chairs in the reading room. We ended up like refugees sprawled all over the place la. But its all good, since I got suffficient sleep/rest. An alert DC = a happy DC. :D
Physics SPA skill A is a killerrrrr. Not that its extremely hard, but its very specific to each experiment. I dont want to think. Lol.
Oh. I saw tag on the bus home today, and he was sleeping. I sat next to him, but didnt want to wake him, seeing how peaceful he looked. However, I did accidentally wake him up....ahwell.
When theres nothing in common, even a word would seem too much. I figured that basically sums up...us. I want to talk. Its just how everytime we have nothing substantial to talk about, to relate to. And it feels really good to be around you, yet really really awkward at the same time.
I do wish I had something witty to say everytime.
But I dont, and its taking its toll.
After 2 terrible weeks of miserable crap, I can honestly say that things are looking up again, and hopefully itll stay that way. Thank God. I know some people dont believe in God, but I cant help but feel safe and happy knowing He's always looking out for me. You can say that divine intervention came when I needed it most, and I find renewed strength in me right now. Thank you bryan and josh for everything when I felt like crap just 2 days ago. I shant elaborate since my expression isnt felicitous enough to make anyone who reads this understand what I want to say.
School felt better today, and I actually could do Math! HAH! EAT THAT.
It seems complex numbers isnt as complex as it initially seemed. More like random, useless, a-whole-bunch-of-alphabets-they-call-numbers. Im not proficient in it. But at least I can cope, abit.
Training was exceptional. I felt great! Which is quite amazing considering how most other training sessions are not nearly as enjoyable. My first game was dismal, but like I said, I didnt crash-and-burn. Nearly every shot I made felt great, but the result didnt reflect that, and like gabriel said, my CNV reacts differently from the MaxXx that I recently practice more often with. My shots went high and I had little luck with the spares. On the second, and final roll-off game, I shot a 229, my second highest I think. It sure as hell didnt feel like a 229, and I wasnt OMG WOW 229 and all that, but nvm, it was a good game with 7 strikes. Averaged a 173 for these 2 games. I had a blast bowling the second game (obviously) and then the 2 games after training with gabe and sufen. At the end of the day, I went home with an average of around 164, or possibly higher. Not much better off than my previous averages, but I felt so much better bowling and had confidence in my shots at least, in both my strike and spare shots.
Funfunfun. Lets keep this up.
PHYSICS PLEASE GET AN 'S' AT LEAST SO I CAN BOWL AT A DIVS WTHHHHH! PLEASE....
lalala~
im hoping that, like you said, time will do miracles.
i will have faith. perhaps we do need time on our own.
a new beginning on our own;
because it is only when we first knew each other, that we truely enjoyed the times we had.
when you come back down
if you land on your feet
i hope you find a way to make it back to me;
Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. And so they did.
When things all go wrong at the same time, you tend to get affected. Really really affected. Im sorry if I offended people today, since I acted like a mean jerk to alot of people today. Especially to joshua. Sorry guys, sorry josh. I never should have acted the way I did, though in all honesty I dont think keeping all that pent up frustration in me will do me any good either. I solemnly vow to TRY to not let that ever happen. And I guess I might have left a negative impression on some of the junior bowlers today, but bowling is the least of my concerns as of now. It wasnt even something I worried about, right up till today, when other crap messed up my game pretty badly. Roll-offs on friday to look forward to then. I will not crash-and-burn.
Some things are beyond my control, and it is kinda depressing to know you cant do much. My dad's not feeling well, and it isnt good. Not one bit. Im trying to be positive in front of him and all, but its just different. So yeah. Im not even that good with my academics, and that fact might come back to haunt me in the form of suspension from A divisions. Then theres my incompetence in front of you. This is, however, definitely within my control. Im just not dealing with it well enough. #!$%. Enough has been said. I talked the talk, so now walk the walk. Actions > meaningless drivel. No point dwelling on this if I dont even put in minimal effort.
After a tiresome, messed up day, it seems I dont have much to find solace in. How did joy just disappear from my life just like that? Life used to be good. Indulging in DotA wont help either. It just helps kill time and keeps me from idling. The time I kill, is killing me. So I shall pray hard that my concentration will prevail, and keep me focused on revision and work. Hopefully.
baby the only joy in my life
is you.
its so blatantly obvious when i enjoy math lecture.
and math isnt even my favourite subject;